YOUCAT Lesson 262
YOUCAT the catechism for Catholic
youth
262 What is necessary for a Christian,
sacramental marriage?
A sacramental marriage has three necessary elements: (a)
free consent, (b) the affirmation of a life-long, exclusive union, and (c)
openness to children. The most profound
thing about a Christian marriage, however, is the couple’s knowledge: “We are a
living image of the love between Christ and the Church.” [1644-1654,
1664]
Photo: …..Bob, Laurie and
John on Lake Michigan at Baileys Harbor, Wi. …..262
The requirement of unity and indissolubility is directed in
the first place against polygamy, which Christianity views as a fundamental
offence against charity and human rights; it is also directed against what
could be called “successive polygamy”, a series of non-binding love affairs that
never arrive at one, great, irrevocable commitment. The requirement of marital fidelity entails a
willingness to enter a lifelong union, which excludes affairs outside the
marriage. The requirement of openness to
fertility means that the Christian married couple is willing to accept any
children that God may send them. Couples
who remain childless are called by God to become “fruitful” in some other
way. A marriage in which one of these
elements is excluded at the marriage ceremony is not valid.
“An ‘open’ marriage is a marriage that was never entered
into.” Theodor Weissenborn (b. 1933,
German writer)
“Love is perfected in fidelity.” Soren Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
MONOGAMY, POLYGAMY (from the Greek monos=one, polys=many,
and gamos=marriage): marriage to one person or marriage to several persons at
once. Christianity forbids polygamy,
which is also punished by the state as the crime of “bigamy” (Greek bi=two).
The unity and indissolubility of marriage
…….1644 The love of the spouses requires, of its very nature, the unity
and indissolubility of the spouses' community of persons, which embraces their
entire life: "so they are no longer two, but one flesh."(Matthew 19:6; compare Genesis 2:24.)153 They
"are called to grow continually in their communion through day-to-day
fidelity to their marriage promise of total mutual self-giving."(Familiaris
Consortio 19.)154 This
human communion is confirmed, purified, and completed by communion in Jesus
Christ, given through the sacrament of Matrimony. It is deepened by lives of
the common faith and by the Eucharist received together. –Catechism of the Catholic Church, Second Edition
…….1645 "The
unity of marriage, distinctly recognized by our Lord, is made clear in the
equal personal dignity which must be accorded to man and wife in mutual and
unreserved affection."(Gaudium
et Spes 49 § 2)155 Polygamy is contrary to conjugal love which is undivided and exclusive.(Compare Familiaris
Consortio 19.)156 –CCC
…….1646 By its very nature conjugal love requires the inviolable
fidelity of the spouses. This is the consequence of the gift of themselves
which they make to each other. Love seeks to be definitive; it cannot be an
arrangement "until further notice." The "intimate union of
marriage, as a mutual giving of two persons, and the good of the children,
demand total fidelity from the spouses and require an unbreakable union between
them."(Gaudium
et Spes 48 § 1.)157 –CCC
…….1647 The
deepest reason is found in the fidelity of God to his covenant, in that of
Christ to his Church. Through the sacrament of Matrimony the spouses are
enabled to represent this fidelity and witness to it. Through the sacrament,
the indissolubility of marriage receives a new and deeper meaning. –CCC
…….1648 It can
seem difficult, even impossible, to bind oneself for life to another human
being. This makes it all the more important to proclaim the Good News that God
loves us with a definitive and irrevocable love, that married couples share in
this love, that it supports and sustains them, and that by their own
faithfulness they can be witnesses to God's faithful love. Spouses who with
God's grace give this witness, often in very difficult conditions, deserve the
gratitude and support of the ecclesial community.(Compare Familiaris
Consortio 20.)158 –CCC
…….1649 Yet there are some
situations in which living together becomes practically impossible for a
variety of reasons. In such cases the Church permits the physical separation of the
couple and their living apart. The spouses do not cease to be husband and wife
before God and so are not free to contract a new union. In this difficult
situation, the best solution would be, if possible, reconciliation. The Christian
community is called to help these persons live out their situation in a
Christian manner and in fidelity to their marriage bond which remains
indissoluble.(Compare Familiaris
Consortio 83; Codex Iuris Canonici,
cann. 1151-1155.)159 –CCC
…….1650 Today there are
numerous Catholics in many countries who have recourse to civil divorce and contract
new civil unions. In fidelity to the words of Jesus Christ - "Whoever
divorces his wife and marries another, commits adultery against her; and if she
divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery"(Mark 10:11-12.)160 the
Church maintains that a new union cannot be recognized as valid, if the first
marriage was. If the divorced are remarried civilly, they find themselves in a
situation that objectively contravenes God's law. Consequently, they cannot
receive Eucharistic communion as long as this situation persists. For the same
reason, they cannot exercise certain ecclesial responsibilities. Reconciliation
through the sacrament of Penance can be granted only to those who have repented
for having violated the sign of the covenant and of fidelity to Christ, and who
are committed to living in complete continence. –CCC
…….1651 Toward Christians
who live in this situation, and who often keep the faith and desire to bring up
their children in a Christian manner, priests and the whole community must
manifest an attentive solicitude, so that they do not consider themselves
separated from the Church, in whose life they can and must participate as
baptized persons:
They
should be encouraged to listen to the Word of God, to attend the Sacrifice of
the Mass, to persevere in prayer, to contribute to works of charity and to
community efforts for justice, to bring up their children in the Christian
faith, to cultivate the spirit and practice of penance and thus implore, day by
day, God's grace.(Familiaris
Consortio 84.)161 –CCC
…….1652 "By
its very nature the institution of marriage and married love is ordered to the
procreation and education of the offspring and it is in them that it finds its
crowning glory."(Gaudium
et Spes 48 § 1; 50.)162
Children
are the supreme gift of marriage and contribute greatly to the good of the
parents themselves. God himself said: "It is not good that man should be
alone," and "from the beginning [he] made them male and female";
wishing to associate them in a special way in his own creative work, God
blessed man and woman with the words: "Be fruitful and multiply."
Hence, true married love and the whole structure of family life which results
from it, without diminishment of the other ends of marriage, are directed to
disposing the spouses to cooperate valiantly with the love of the Creator and
Savior, who through them will increase and enrich his family from day to day.(Gaudium
et Spes 50 § 1; compare Genesis 2:18; Matthew 19:4; Genesis 1:28.)163 –CCC
…….1653 The fruitfulness of
conjugal love extends to the fruits of the moral, spiritual, and supernatural
life that parents hand on to their children by education. Parents are the
principal and first educators of their children.(Compare Gravissimum
Educationis 3.)164 In this sense the
fundamental task of marriage and family is to be at the service of life.(Compare Familiaris
Consortio 28.)165 –CCC
…….1654 Spouses to whom God
has not granted children can nevertheless have a conjugal life full of meaning,
in both human and Christian terms. Their marriage can radiate a fruitfulness of
charity, of hospitality, and of sacrifice. –CCC
IN BRIEF
…….1664 Unity, indissolubility, and openness to
fertility are essential to marriage. Polygamy is incompatible with the unity of
marriage; divorce separates what God has joined together; the refusal of
fertility turns married life away from its "supreme gift," the child (Gaudium
et Spes 50 § 1).
--CCC
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